Actually, it’s God’s list!
Category: Fear
Death Stinks
Death’s stench is a metaphor.
Confirmation Bias
“People are prone to believe what they want to believe.*”
How much of what we think we believe is true? How much do we believe it because we want to or because it fits our previous decision on a topic, a medical issue, a political candidate, our hobbies—ANYTHING.
I like to think I’m challenging myself to grow in new ways by reading different genres of novels, a variety of non-fiction books on a broad spectrum of viewpoints. But am I really? What about podcasts?
How can we be sure we’re not seeking agreement with where we are now? What are the signs? Are we doing the same things again and again, but thinking we are doing something different? I pride myself on my creativity. My fearlessness. But I now must challenge myself to understand if I’m really just confirming what I already think or know. So, I’m going to try the following. I’ll let you know what I find out.
- Make a list of the last six novels I read.
- List the last five non-fiction books I read (not purchased, read).
- What were the last four classes I took?
- Name the last three times I ate a food I’ve never eaten before.
- Summarize the last two conversations that I shared with someone twenty or more years younger than myself and twenty or more years older than me.
- When did I try a different browser than the one I normally use?
Confirmation bias keeps people in a rut. Scary but true. Stepping out of our rut is REALLY scary!
Change scares everyone to an extent. Knowing when you’re suffering from confirmation bias might be the first step to changing your mind, even a little. We’re not suggesting which way to think, but we would like to know if you are brave enough to confirm that you have confirmation bias. Or not.
Source: * Psychology Today
Image compliments of Pexels.com
The First Time
First times are sacred. First times cannot be repeated.
Feedback Is a Gift
If you have any feedback… I will say “thank you.”
Personal Board of Directors
Do you have a “Personal Board of Directors”?
I have seen the idea in the Wall Street Journal and am considering the power of same. It’s also another interpretation of the phrase:
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, [including yourself].”
~ Jim Rohn (motivational speaker)
I chose to borrow the slight addition [including yourself] to the Jim Rohn quote (hat tip to https://personalexcellence.co/blog/average-of-5-people/) because I agree. WE are alas, one of those peeps we cannot evade, avoid, or distance from as much as we’d like to sometimes.
I’m pondering a board of directors. Whom would I ask? Like dating. What if they say no?
If I choose to stay in ponder land, I will be safe but stuck. Hoping to unstick soon.
If you have a personal board of directors, I’d love to know how you approached them. What gave you the courage to ask them, and how did you choose them? Were they the right choice? What were your requirements?
The Imposter Syndrome
“Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.” ~ Oscar Wilde
Changing Names
I listened to a Duolingo French Podcast today, and it talks about a young man who discovers that his grandfather changed his surname from a Jewish name to a French name during the war. The young man tried to change his name to his grandfather’s name but was told he could not because of the French laws at the time. * Spoiler Alert*: Eventually, he was able to change his name. Times and laws change.
Photo by Djalma Paiva Armelin on Pexels.com
Our names are particularly important to us – both our first and last names. I changed my first name from Kathy to Kathryn, as I disliked Kathy growing up. There were three Kathys in my grade in elementary school, so I switched to Kathryn in college. Did I change? No. But my name did. And, my identity was now aligned with my name. I was lucky I liked Kathryn. What if I wanted a different name altogether?
I was lucky I liked Kathryn.
Some women keep their maiden names. Some give theirs up. Most men don’t change their surnames unless, like the person in the podcast, they want to achieve some goal. He wanted to honor his heritage.
Sharp left turn ahead:
I’m wondering if I want to find my bio mom and dad after all this time. I never looked for them growing up. Maybe I want to know who they were, or maybe not. It’s scary. If I did find them, would I change my name? Would I take hers or his? Either way, would it change who I am?
Wait. How can we identify with something we never chose for ourselves? We choose our dogs’ names. We choose our clothes. Our cars. Our friends. We never “choose” our names.
Maybe our names choose us. And we can accept them or not.
Excuses
Don’t make excuses.
Alligators
The next time you have a massive task facing you, you are likely to see it as a swamp filled with alligators. These menacing creatures are the ridiculously sneaky (yes, ridiculously so) critters that keep you from crossing the swamp, a.k.a. finishing your task. In fact, these large-mouth bozos will do worse: they scare you from even starting.
You’re not alone. We all have swamps. We certainly have fears. But what if the alligator is mechanical? Or he just ate? Or he’s lazy? Or maybe, you take an alligator gun and shoot it? Yeah. Not PC, but hey. This is YOUR swamp. It’s YOUR task. Your life. Your goal. As Peggy Noonan said in a recent WSJ column,
“Never let the idiots stop you.”
In this case, think of the alligator as an idiot. A gatekeeper moron who says you do not possibly deserve to accomplish the task upon which you are embarking, in this case, crossing “his” swamp. The gatekeeper/idiot/alligator moron says, “You’re too young, too old, dumb, male, female, tall, short, green.” Pick one.
“Yes, but…”
There you go! Stop. Look in the mirror. Right now! What do you see? An alligator! Yup. We are our own worst alligators.
You can always drain the swamp. Just sayin’. Be brave.