What if you knew when you were going to die?
Category: Living
What if Death Quit Her Job?
Would we rejoice?
Maybe. But what about her?
Death has had nothing but sadness in her day job. No one likes her. No one wants to see her coming. She clearly does not enjoy her work. Who would? Coming to work is depressing. “Hello, Mrs. Jones. I’m going to take your soul today.” And guess what? She has very few (no) friends.
And you thought you had a bad job.
Somewhere along the way, Death ended up collecting souls as part of the team in Heaven. Eventually she finds out why. And that’s not to say everyone goes to heaven after they die. No. That’s not it. And that’s not Death’s job, you see. She just makes the rounds according to the schedule and collects the souls so the other departments can get them to the correct eternity. You know. If you sin too much, you go to Hell. If you’ve accumulated enough brownie points, as it were, you get to spend eternity in Heaven. Everything is free there. Free health club memberships, country club passes, zoos, museums…It’s all free. It’s fun in the beginning but well. Everything gets boring after a while. Even Perfection. And free booze.
Back to Death. She definitely wins top prize for “sucky job” and to offset her terrible work life, she buys beautiful clothes. Her retail therapy outings have earned her the nickname Coco for Coco Chanel, her favorite designer. But she can wear Vera Wang, too. Betsey Johnson, Calvin Klein. It doesn’t matter as along as it’s expensive and gorgeous. But Chanel is her bestie.
When our story opens, Death quits. Yup. Finally, she’s had it up to here. The cruise ships are the absolute worst. Bodies and their attached souls float around in the ocean shivering their lips off, and Death has to handle each person. Some are still alive, and in every manner of scared to death. And then Death comes by. Imagine. Cold. Wet. Make it freezing, soaked. Almost drowning or recently drowned. (What a crappy way to go!) “It’s okay, Mr. Smith. I’m here to help you pass peacefully.” BAM. Mr. Smith bops Death in the jaw. “Oh, no you don’t!” The arguments over the years would make your hair hurt. Seriously. Death has heard them all. But now, she’s decided to quit.
And it’s not pretty. You can read all about it in my book, Deathlist, coming to a bookstore near you. There’s a lot more to it than Coco Chanel and Death, however. I’d hang on to your bucket seats. It’s quite a ride. Funny. Philosophical. Profane. Good and evil. Life’s purpose. High concept stuff wrapped around a book in which God plays too much golf, and the Holy Spirit is almost as much a clothes horse as Death. And there are epic battles afoot, Stay tuned for more posts about this crazy novel. Until then, I’m thinking we want Death to keep her job. Just sayin’.
Once Upon a Time …
Our lives are “hero’s journeys.”
AWE
…Recapture the childlike feelings of wide-eyed excitement… ~ Wayne Dyer
The Imposter Syndrome
“Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.” ~ Oscar Wilde
Did I Remember?
Did I remember to bring … the luggage? the tickets? the kids? Was I supposed to?
Moderation
“Nobody does moderation well.”
–Greg McKeown (@GregoryMcKeown) author of “Essentialism, the Disciplined Pursuit of Less”
- When moderation doesn’t work.
Author, speaker Greg McKeown revealed during a Tim Ferriss Show that he gave up sugar for a year. It was reportedly easier than cutting back, a.k.a. moderation.
The folks at Alcoholics Anonymous know moderation doesn’t work. An alcoholic cannot ‘pick up.’ Not even once, or they’re back to day one. A newcomer. AA has been around since 1935 and it has worked for a lot of people.
2. Moderation takes discipline.
Seems crazy in a way, but sometimes it’s easier to never start than it is to start and stop. One bite of that cherry pie leads to two. Then, “Ah heck. I’ll just finish the whole piece and start on my diet tomorrow.”
3. Moderation leads to decision fatigue.
We have a big toe in the water, but we haven’t moved to the immersion stage. We’re on the fence. It’s a kind of decision fatigue that author Gretchen Rubin discusses in her book “Better Than Before.” We can’t move forward or backward because we have not made up our minds. I’m tired just thinking about it.
4. Moderation undermines good habits.
Abstinence sounds monkish, but if it invokes a good habit, it’s freeing. Habit-supported abstinence eliminates temptation and saves the right kind of energy for more creative endeavors.
Lastly, we cannot forget this quote:
5. “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” ~ Oscar Wilde
Boarding Pass
Hand it over. Step across the little gap, and climb aboard the future. You’re on your way.
Possibility
I stand at the edge of possibility. It takes my breath away.
Every single moment of every single day, we can choose to be the person we were meant to be. I think it’s simple. Mostly, we have to get out of our own way.
I’m reading The Art of Possibility for the third time. I am convinced that we must commit to being open to the universe, as the authors Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander state. We have to be prepared to receive; able to live in the present; willing to slide through our mistakes on our way to a hope (but not a guarantee) of perfection because we are one of the lucky ones that get to do our life’s work.
I love the idea of a happiness that we can obtain by the way we approach our days. Here’s a great suggestion from the book. Rule No. 6 says,
“Don’t take yourself so seriously.”
What a great concept. Yes, but how do I slow down enough to inhale possibility on the days when I am just not feeling it? I can always start by counting my blessings. I have lots.
Then I will close my eyes and imagine myself on the boat pictured below. It’s always there: Possibility.
Leave Room in Your Suitcase
So, did you think this post was going to be about travel? Great. It is. But, it’s not.
Hopefully, we are all going somewhere. However, we are not always going on vacation. Or going out of town. Or going on a safari, per se. We are, however, traveling through life. We need to have our suitcase packed, our selves ready, open, and available to step, fly, jump, and fall forward into the next place. Our metaphorical bags should always be packed, as in why slow down to throw in a toothbrush when the next adventure may have toothbrushes waiting for you at the other end? Or better yet, we won’t need toothbrushes there at all. Our teeth will automatically be cleaned by busy nanobots grinning as they scrub, singing happy tunes, and making you happy to boot.
So while the suitcase should be ready to go, it should have room to add stuff. We want to leave space in the suitcase of our minds to put in cool new ideas, experience an image in a way we’ve never done so before, or taste a new aroma, or savor a different apple with a cool name like “Jazz” or “Envy.”
We save a spot for experimentation. We can pause in the quietness to read an author we wouldn’t have tried without the clarity that white space in a suitcase brings. We can “hear” a not-my-usual color; “wear” a not-my-kind of music. (Not typos: Hear a color and wear music were on purpose.)
I invite you on your next journey to leave room in your suitcase. In fact, I will leave room in mine, too, and maybe we can meet in the middle.
Always keep a bag packed!